Why Hello There, Irony
by Striped-Hoodies
Summary: His mom finds it ironic how Red doesn't talk much. Green finds it ironic how Red actually loves him. Red finds it ironic how Green whacks him more as they get closer. - Fluffy Green/Red (Originalshipping) ONESHOT


**A/N**: sighity sigh

i don't know what's up with the whole update-a-chapter-and-feed-people-crappy-oneshots thing right now but

it's going to continue happening.

but here's something new; this one features tiny and innocent Green and Red (and it's in RED'S POV for once woahhh)

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><p><strong>Why Hello There, Irony<strong>

**xxxxxx -Then- xxxxxx**

"Hey brat! Come out!"

Even from inside of my home, I can hear the cheeky voice clearly. I know who it is; how would I not know if he bothers me every single day?

But I don't want to come out today. It's hot outside. All he - what was his name again? I remember it was a color like mine, but very different. The opposite of red is... Blue? All that Blue did was call me names anyway and 'smells me later'. Mom tells me not to talk badly about someone but I am just thinking, _thinking,_ that Blue is kind of cocky. I mean, normally kids that move into new neighborhoods are shy, but Blue is the opposite of that. Our roles should be reversed.

I think a lot. For a five-year-old, mom says. Mom also says it's 'ironic' that I don't _talk_ a lot.

"Get your butt out here!" The front door slams open and I yelp. Blue stands at the open door and peers into my home. I crouch behind the table I was drawing on...

What do I do now? Blue is like a burglar breaking into the house!

I hear his voice again. I can tell he is walking closer to my table because his voice gets louder. "I know you're in here!"

I can feel my own heart pounding in my chest. "I can see you, you idiot." Liar. He can't see me; _I_ can't see _him_ after all.

"Red." I start trembling because he never calls me by my name. I feel a hand on my back, and I yelp again.

"What do you want, Blue?" I say quietly and carefully. Who knows what he might do? He just broke into my house!

"You..." He breathes in. "YOU LITTLE BRAT!" I still don't understand why he calls me little when I'm the same age.

I gasp as he suddenly jumps at me and holds me to the floor. I knew it! See? He just did something unpredictable! "L - Let go!"

"YOU FORGOT MY NAME! I REMEMBERED YOURS!"

"Blue...?"

"WRONG! 'S Green! You have to remember it or else there's something wrong with your head!"

"Ngh," I struggle to get out of his grip. I don't want this. He's yelling at me and he's gonna hit me.

"Stop squirming! Where's my 'sorry'?"

It's "where's my apology" not "where's my sorry." But I know not to say it aloud; he can hit me. How am I supposed to remember his name? It is a color like mine after all! There are thousands of colors!

Green? Unreasonable person. Stupid, stupid, stupid Green!

I suddenly feel my eyes getting wet and my vision is blurry. Oh, no...

"H - Hey, are you crying?" Green looks worried all of a sudden.

I start sobbing and my hands are rubbing at my eyes. This is too embarrassing. I don't want to cry in front of him, so I try to stop. But the sobs keep coming.

Green should know how embarrassing it is to cry in front of someone. I made him cry once. He kept trying to get my attention by saying his grandpa is a famous Pokémon professor. I didn't think he would cry when I said my mom was a cool mom.

He told me he didn't have one. I think we were friends on that day.

He looks panicky and gets off of me quickly. I can't sit up; I feel really weak, and he disappears out of my vision for a second. But he comes back and hauls me up on top of him so that our old position is reversed.

I look down at him confused. What is he trying to pull now?

"I didn't hit you but... Hit me as much as you'd like!" he says to me.

My eyes widen and my heart starts thumping again. Should I give him a punch for all he's done? But... If I do, he will feel scared like me. It is unfair, too, because he didn't hit me. He's very brave if he is willing to do that, I suddenly think.

His scrunched-up face doesn't make me think he's brave though.

I giggle, and my face feels really weird because of the tears and my stuffy nose. I see his eyes open wide, and he looks surprised. "You're... not gonna hit me?"

I climb off of him and sit in my old position at my table again, but this time my attention is at him instead of drawing. "Uhm..." He scratches his head and sits up. He looks at the floor awkwardly because I'm staring at him really hard. Green is really interesting.

"Oh yeah!" He suddenly lights up. "I got ice-cream!"

Ice-cream? Ice-cream! I follow him outside the house, and he hands me a popsicle from a bag.

"Thanks,_ Green_," I say.

He's shy, "Yeah."

**xxxxxx -Now- xxxxxx**

I hear the rustle of sheets and open my eyes lightly. I see Green's gray shirt, signalling he was not laying in bed anymore. I loosely place my arms around his waist and cuddle into him. It's still early.

"Red, I need to get to the gym," he yawns without looking at me.

My grip hardens. He punches my arm really hard, and I have no choice but to let go.

"You didn't hit me when we were little," I say quietly.

"Well, I don't go around calling you 'brat' now."

I huff.

When he finishes getting ready and walks out of the bathroom, I'm still in bed playing with my hair. He waves to me a goodbye and is about to step out of the room when I smile and say, "Smell ya later, _Blue_."

He walks to me with narrow eyes and slaps me upside the head.

Instead of crying, I giggle.

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><p><strong>AN: **I seriously

did not know

where I was going with this.

But i applaud myself because this is the only fiction i finished in a one day hoooraay.

i'm a loser (Gary was here)

~Ducky


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